Don´t take it personally if someone has said something about you. it says more about them!

I ´m active in the union, I hold a place on the board and I love the conversations and the things that involve us as workers against our employer. Even if our employer is the state of Sweden you would think that everything is cool and no problem. No, no, no. Quite the opposite. The union has to struggle for every penny when it´s time to raise our salaries.
Today we had a meeting about our litte group where I work. We´ve had these meetings since december 2013 and we had our last one today and we talked about what we think about things.
It was a constructive meeting but one of the persons wanted to make a statement and took me as an example. She said that she told me to work because we had one customer and I did not pay attention. I looked at her not really understanding what she was talking about and I said nothing. I said nothing because I felt I had nothing to say and the only thing that went trough my mind when she was talking was " that is her opinion" "let her have her opinion" don´t say anything, not because I just accepted what she thought of me but because whatever she thought was wrong with my way of working or whatever says more about her than me. 
I have had these thoughts a lot of times in the lasts weeks and now I had to "graduate" I was being put up for the test. First was not knowing what to say, then the voices said what I listed above, then I felt a pain in my chest and wanting to cry (it was as if my father was telling little me what I was doing wrong, with other words the past was showing up again.) . I was feeling a deep pain but then she started to cry and I have a hard time seeing someone crying, so after a while I started crying to and told the group that I too have pain in my chest not because of what she said but because of what was done by another person when we about 6 months ago had to point at the person who we thought was the problem. I too had a thorn inside because I had to point at a person and say what I thought was the problem. And I told the woman who encouraged us to say who was the problem and told her that that was the shitiest thing she could ever do to us. I used the word shitiest! She wanted to talk to me to explain but I said I was not intrested in what she had to say. I was proud of myself that I said something like that because I would never have said anything like that a year ago! 
When I got home I found a very good article about 



I felt how the anger and feeling just slipped away and the only thing I have now is gratitude and thanks. Thanks for showing that I was not mastering myself and that I have an acceptance of feeling this but not staying in these emotions. 
I approve of myself the way I am and I am safe.

Namaste!






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